Dear Saint-Germain, for a long time I feel that I have had such trouble finding my path in life. I already gave up my studies three different times, and I feel disoriented, as the pursuit of my needs and interests does not seem to fit with the demands of the modern world. I've been on a spiritual quest and journey back to my true self since last year, and there is nothing else I want more than to pursue this path.
I feel the need to liberate myself totally, and do something that is just as nourishing for myself as it is for others and for the earth. In the past, I've always thought that my passion was music. I started studying music two times, but every time I failed because of my resistance against pressure, judgments, and rigorous structures which such an education brings along.
As I'm letting go of the need to be, or do anything in order to feel valuable, I realize that there is nothing else at this point that takes me to where I want to get in the end. Where am I going next? Thank you for your help.
I AM Saint-Germain.
Here you are dear friend, gaining more clarity about the direction that you want to take in your life. Though it may look as if you are a drifter at this moment, and that you can't really figure out where you are going, what is truly happening is that you are finding your voice among the distractions around you.
It is normal to feel like you do when you break away from a conventional path. Your intuition is strong, and you feel so clearly that there is something more for you out there. Yet, at the same time you find that you are still under the influence of those you grew up with, and the people that have shaped the understanding of your reality for so long. You are undergoing a major change in your life, so don't really underestimate it.
For this reason, this would be a good time for you to find clarity about what you want to do in life, without having the pressure of other people around you, trying to force your hand, or to sway your judgement about what you should do. This is all the more important, since you have not figured out yet how to respond to the distractions that are present around you. No matter what, you should know that you are on the right path, and listening to your intuition is still the best thing you can do for yourself right now.
As you've seen it already in your journey, you've had moments of upheaval and change that have put you on the edge, but it is exactly through these life situations that your new view on life is being shaped. These shifts have helped you to break free from the reality that you were a part of that didn't feel aligned with who you are now.
Inner and Outer Limitations
Now... while you did break free of some limitations in the physical world -- in your outer world, you need to understand that some limitations are still present in your inner world. That's why you may continue to see some old experiences coming back to you, and they will be challenging you through doubt, or through some people in your life that may try to convince you of being on the wrong path.
When you are in such a situation, you will need to remember not to fight and resist. The people (or the situation you are in) only represent an energy that has not matured yet, and is still developing within you. You will need to remember to not be critical toward yourself, but to be kind and gentle, and to trust that in time, you will find your way. Instead of fighting, and trying to convince anyone about what's wrong with what they seem to force on you, remember that YOU are in control. You are the authority in your life, and when you listen to your inner voice, there will be a gentler way to respond.
It's important that you restrain yourself from being either aggressive, or passive-aggressive. Yes, you can assert yourself, but in a positive way. When you know your path in life, you state it to others, and people understand the power of clarity behind your choices. But when you struggle to figure out where you're going, that's when you let yourself fall into conflict. That is when you try to force your view on others, and this only creates possible hurt feelings.
Change Comes From the Inside Out
Certainly this is a journey of a lifetime. It is one that you have to stay on for months, and years, yet please know that the results of your dedication will start showing up eventually. Don't be rash and impulsive, expecting everything to change with one big blast. That is not the way your life changes. It all happens from the inside out, and you are gently delivering your joy into this existence. And if you are not using your energy on conflicts, that energy will be available for more constructive, and creative ways to live your life.
What about your journey of discovering your passion then? Whether it is music, or something different like a spiritual practice, your passion will reveal Who You Are to the world. It is both a journey of learning who you really are, and how to be sharing who you are with others. Whatever the path will be, you only need to remember to be dedicated to this journey. In the end, it doesn't really matter what the journey is about, but it matters that you persevere.
That means, when you need to learn or practice something, you need to put everything into what you are doing. You have to pay attention to the important details, and you have to remember that no matter how hard this work is for you, it will be through the results of your labor that you will experience the greatest satisfactions. Having a structure, following rigorous plans of implementing ideas, sticking to your tasks are all very important skills that you need to develop and practice in this lifetime, no matter what it is that you do. So choose the one thing that speaks truly to your heart now, and then stay with it. Don't give up, even if it feels discouraging at times. Continue to persevere, even if it doesn't look like any results are available soon. Stay with what you do because it matters to you, because you put your heart and your sweat into it.
You will feel discouraged at some point, so when you do, or if others try to discourage you then it is time for you to step up, and to speak up for what you believe in. Speak with kindness, with diplomacy, and with an understanding that most of the time, it is people's fear talking to you. But if you speak up this way, you learn to be a promoter of your own good, and of what you love.
Challenges appear in life because you need to move through them. They help you discover that beyond the courage to fight, there is great satisfaction in stating your beliefs to the people you care about, without feeling embarrassed, or like you are a failure in life. Standing for yourself, and meeting these challenges with courage and determination, will help you continue on the path that you have chosen for yourself.
One other important thing to mention about conflicts is that when you deal with them, or with people who disagree with you, it is essential to make sure that you are not entering conflicts because of an old habit, and certainly not because of the love for competition. The competitive side in you, may need to be mastered, and then you can develop this side of you toward the goals that you care about, and not dispersing your resources through conflicts.
When you know who the people are that will awaken the need for conflict in you, retreat in silence, or find something silly to think about that helps disengage you from the conversation, and then let it go. Learn to practice this, and step away when you feel provoked. Inside yourself say NO to complications of such kind, because so much of your energy could go toward creating the things that you love. Otherwise, you will learn the hard way how much energy you have left to create, and manifest the life of your dreams, when all conflict is set aside.
Change Is Happening
Even though it may look as though things aren't so rosy now, and you may worry a lot about how you will move forward, change is happening. Your current situation is only temporary. Just as soon as you decide what is important for you, and then get to work and dedicate yourself fully to it, the obstacles in your life will begin to make way for a new path. It will be important though that whatever you choose, you do it because YOU believe in it, and not because someone that you respect and think high of, is recommending you something to do.
Your belief and determination to do what matters to you will bring about the changes in your circumstances of living. You need to follow your intuition, and to believe in yourself. Be aware of the direction you're taking, reflect on each step along the way, and stay flexible on your journey when you encounter obstacles. It is all part of walking your own path, and as long as you are willing to do it, the dark will turn to light again, and you will find your rewards on this journey.
Remember dear friend that you have many guides and friends at your side. Indeed, I Am Saint-Germain.
This material is offered to help free us from limitations by expanding human consciousness. It may be distributed without charge, provided this intention is honored. Commercialization by other parties requires the expressed written consent of the copyright holders, Alexandra and Dan. If you are reproducing this material, please credit the authors by name and include the following link: http://www.joyandclarity.com
© copyright 2007-2015 Alexandra and Dan