This morning I woke up worrying. It didn't start out that way. I opened my eyes to bright sunlight and smiled as I felt the warmth of Michael's body next to mine and the familiar weight of Poupon cuddled on top of my feet.
My moment of bliss went to hell in a handbasket though, the moment my mind joined the party and created a racket!
I only have 17 days left to shop for Christmas.
I still haven't shipped the gifts piled up in the pantry.
It's too cold out to take them to the UPS store.
I hope Michael doesn't freeze to death at the football game today.
How do those guys play ball in thirty-degree weather anyway? Don't their hands go numb?
My hands hurt.
What if the arthritis is getting worse from all the typing I've been doing?
It's probably my diet.
I need to drink more green juice.
And swear off dairy and wheat and anything white forever and ever.
Oh, and I have to give up chocolate.
But I still have more typing to do to get through all the email sitting in my inbox.
I've been lazy about responding to email.
Because I'm such a procrastinator.
What if people think I don't care about them?
Crap, they probably already think that.
I bet my friend Marie hates me because I haven't gotten back to her about dinner.
Speaking of dinner, what the heck am I going to do with all the food in the fridge left over from the holiday party last night?
Ok, ok, I said to my mind in a firm, parental tone. Knock it off! I rolled over, cuddled closer to Michael, and wiggled my toes to include Poupon in the love. Then I closed my eyes and remembered...
I forgot to remember that worry is my prompt. It's a signal. A request for my presence. A reminder to come home to where sanity lives. I breathed in slowly and repeated my mantra:
This present moment is peaceful.
This present moment is powerful.
This present moment is all there is.
And when that doesn't work, I just remind myself that any day now I could die and none of these thoughts will matter. At all. Morbid, I know. But it works. There's nothing more important than being fully alive in this moment. A good thing to remember, especially over the next month when too many of us make worrying a full-time job ...
This beautiful video from Audrey will make you feel good. Really good. Watch it here.