Healing Conflict with Compassion

As a peace-loving person, I dislike arguments, almost to the point of being conflict-phobic. I won't watch movies that contain excessive yelling, and I avoid situations and relationships that are filled with drama. I'm much more comfortable with people, situations, and media that are filled with positive words and intentions. The "downer stuff" always seems an unhealthy waste of time to me.

So what about those times when you disagree with someone and need to stand up for your principles? As I experienced this week, it IS possible to speak your truth and get your point across without losing your cool or your integrity.

This week, I had a couple of situations where I felt like Joan of Arc, listening to my divine guidance and yet standing my ground. The first was when an editor who works for one of my foreign publishing houses wrote to me, requesting to remove the name God from one of my books. My first reaction was indignant anger, and a "no way!" stance. The editor said: "People in our country don't like to read the name ‘God.'"

While I can understand the hurt feelings of someone who's had a bad religious experience or whose prayers weren't answered in a certain way, it seems that forming a closer relationship with God would be the healing power they'd need. Yet, you can't shove spirituality, religion, or God down someone's throat. You can't make someone love God by instilling fear or guilt. They need to naturally love God through loving experiences, and that includes reading a healing book that discusses God.

So I talked with the editor's superior calmly and lovingly, so no worries: God stays in my books.

The same day, I met with television producers regarding a show we're creating about highly-sensitive and psychic children. It will be a weekly heartfelt "soap" type of show, one that will be meaningful to both children and parents. We envision depth with a light-heart and comedy.

Our Hollywood studio "pitch meeting" went well until the chief script writer began describing the show as a drama and danger filled, and that the children would all have super-hero talents. Again, my first reaction was anger. Fortunately, I prayed before acting upon the feeling.

I waited until after the pitch meeting and calmly talked with the production company representatives and the script writer. It was apparent that the script writer and I had VERY different points of view. I surrendered any power struggle and simply wished everyone well. I knew I couldn't be involved with a show that I considered exploitive of Indigo children. I was ready to walk away.

Perhaps it was my surrender, but the whole meeting turned around at that point. I was hired on the spot to co-write a brand-new television show that matches my vision of an entertaining yet truthful and gentle program ala "Touched by an Angel," "Sabrina the Teenaged Witch," or "Joan of Arcadia (the first season)" ! We're now in the process of creating the pilot script . . . stayed tuned!!

This week was about staying true to myself without wobbling into blaming anyone or getting into conflicts with others. It was about transforming conflict into compassion . . . for myself and for the people in my life. No one is "right" or "wrong," we just have varied points-of-view based on our own experiences.

And coming from that place of compassion, any seeming conflict that jumped out at me this week, rapidly turned into positive experiences, lessons, and opportunities.


Mike Sawyer 22nd May 2008 11:08 am

Hello Doreen,

Love the spirit of your "Healing conflict with compassion." Never heard of the "conflict-phobic" phrase before, however, I can relate.

Please add my e-mail address to your future reflections.

Thank you.


Hanna Iris Tolonen 22nd May 2008 3:12 pm

Yay, for the pilot order! Does anyone know which network it is, ie which channel would probably air it? Hopefully it's ABC (or NBC) cause it would pretty much mean it's a quality show and ABC has been pretty good for the "spirit people" this past season, don't you think? :)

camelman555 22nd May 2008 6:27 pm

yes a good idea offered, is either accepted or rejected based on its own merits , that same idea imposed BEGS rebelion simply due to its perhaps inappropriate method of presentation , freewill eh ? ¿

camelman555 22nd May 2008 6:31 pm

worked out a while ago that if you need to deal with the "fight fire with fire " situation makes much more sense to "fight fire with water"

Rita 10th August 2008 7:56 pm

Hello Doreen,

Bravo for standing your ground. I am in the film businiess and understand the strength it can take to stand up for what you believe in, in a positive manner, especially dealing with this particular crowd. In fact, I just sent an email to this website regarding numerology and it hitting me upside the head. That job I commute to each day, well, I have been working on a major feature film due to be released Feb. 2009.

I applaud your effrots on a pilot, and think spiritual cinema is an awesome idea. I'd love to work on production like that, as I believe when these espisodes are created from or with sinicere intetnion of 'good' or 'god' it can be a very good thing. Stay open, stay positive and everything will work out as intended.

Now, can you help me with this number thing? My email is on a posted coment on numerology and angle communication.


Jamie 6th September 2008 8:18 pm

Thank You!
Love & Peace & Joy!


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Author Information

Doreen Virtue

International best-selling author Doreen Virtue is a doctor of psychology and lifelong clairvoyant who has written extensively about angels, psychic development, and mind-body-spirit topics.

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