I remember an old round we used to sing as children, ‘Make new friends and keep the old, one is silver and the other is gold’. If you have had the friendship shuffle going on in your life for the past 5 years or more, you probably do not have a lot of your old friends left. And that’s OK because we’re heading into a new energy shuffling period that is going to help us rise to a new level of awareness and with it will come a reshuffling of our boundaries and standards and with them, the people and situations in our life. Our old friends will either partner with us on the new path or we will part ways and new friends will take their place.
The ascension path is the proverbial ‘long and winding road’ but it doesn’t really lead to a goal, it continues to wind around as we explore new multi-dimensional aspects and shed old versions of ourselves. The threads that tie or bind us with others are not unbreakable, we just need to know when and how to break them with grace and dignity These are the ‘old friends’ who can become ‘new friends’ if they decide that the sharing our path of expansion and ascension is the right choice for them. They must decide to partner with us on that journey. If not, then we must part ways for our time together at that frequency and connection is over.
Is it hard to let go of a person or the expectations we had of them?
Do we regret the parting or do we regret the lack of appreciation for and acknowledgement of our efforts?
This isn’t harsh, it’s the reality that we must face. We need to acknowledge when someone ‘comes to the end of their energy road’ which means they have reached the upper limit of their energetic expansion and can go no farther. Just as we grow to a certain height and stop growing, on an energetic level some people reach a specific level and cannot expand any farther. If we decide to expand farther than they can go, it’s time to re-think that connection.
This occurs on many different levels and in many areas of our lives. I gave away a crystal today, one that I had for nearly 30 years. It has journeyed with me around the world and has been a constant presence in my life since the day I bought it. Last week I got it out and the message it gave me was very clear, ‘it is time for me to move on to a new owner’. It didn’t feel the same, there was no connection, and I knew our time together was finished. And I knew who it needed to go to since the last time I was with this person I was told by my guides and the crystal that it needed to go to her. So I gave it to her as my time with it is over and now it has a new owner who needs it and its energy for their journey.
We are custodians of the crystals that join us on our path, as well as of all of the other shared energies embodied in people, situations, locations, and events. It is time for us to re-define ‘forever’ so we have some space to make intentional disconnections from our energetic connections, especially those that are found in karmic groups. Those were never intended to be permanent, ‘forever’ obligations or commitments.
At some point we need to acknowledge when we are no longer congruent or aligned in our intention, mission, purpose, and our paths. Sometimes a discussion can resolve that so the parting is avoided and a new partnership at a new level of energetic frequency is created. Other times a parting of the ways is obviously necessary.
This intentional disconnection, from an energetic perspective, requires that we consider the two very important aspects of our ascension path, completion and fulfillment. We want both but sometimes only one is possible. For example, we want a relationship to be complete and fulfilling by meeting our emotional needs, even if that means the person acknowledges the contribution of time, energy, and emotion as they are walking out the door. Fulfillment and completion are blurred lines for us when we want to have both even if we know the relationship can’t continue in its current state or if that person truly is ‘at the end of their energy road’ with us.
Can we be fulfilled knowing we have done all we can do and we aren’t going to get the response we want or have our needs or expectations met to the level that serves us and meets our ego and emotional needs, no matter how hard we try?
Can we be complete knowing that we have done our best and met our karmic and energetic obligations and no further reward is forthcoming and nothing will change? This is a hard lesson for us, acknowledging that ‘happily ever after’ can mean that we are happy when this situation is over, and that person or situation is no longer part of our lives and never will be.
This is a tough issue because we think every relationship has a blessed ‘forever’ reward, and that definition is very personal. Sometimes the end of a karmic cycle is the reward and those endings can feel very incomplete and unfulfilling when we feel we have made a heroic effort that was wasted because our expectations were not met and our efforts were not acknowledged, understood, or appreciated.
As we acknowledge that old friends have served their purpose it is time to re-partner or part ways? The choice will be obvious if you look at the situation without judgment. There is a 3 part test you can do to assess that choice, it’s part of the theme of the January Radiant Light Divine Harmony retreat in Sedona, Arizona.
It’s the energetic ABCTM for all partnerships:
- A stands for alignment – are we aligned in the same path, purpose and potential?
- B stands for balance – is there an equal balance of giving and receiving?
- C stands for congruence – is this relationship congruent, where everything fits and flows and the energy is harmonious?
All 3 of the above are required so if one is missing it’s time to have a responsibility re-think (you thought I was going to say relationship) and look at the obligations for someone’s healing journey we have taken on and why.
Then it is time to gather our courage and make the tough choice to meet our own needs, to set strong energy boundaries that include when and how we achieve complete and fulfillment by ensuring that our needs are met, our priorities and non-negotiables in place, and we are managing our energy flows. And to have the faith and trust in ourselves and in our Source and sources to know that ascension’s ‘long and winding road’ does have a happy ending although forever is not dependent on a person or situation that never ends, it is the promise of the constant, undimmed, forever presence of our own joy, peace, love, and abundance.