Lightworker - Part 2

The galactic history of lightworkers - The birth of the soul

Lightworker souls were born long before the earth and humanity came into being.

Souls are birthed in waves. There is a sense in which souls are eternal with no beginning and no end. But in another sense, they are born at some point. It is at this point that their consciousness reaches a sense of individual self. Before this point, they are already there as a possibility. However there is no consciousness yet of me and other.

The consciousness of “me” arises when somehow a demarcation line is drawn between groups of energies. We have to revert to metaphors in order to explain this.

Think of the ocean for a moment and imagine it to be a huge field of flowing energies, streams that constantly mingle and part. Imagine that a diffuse consciousness pervades the entire ocean. Call it the ocean spirit if you want. After a while, concentrations of consciousness arise at certain places in the ocean. Consciousness here is more focused, less diffuse than in its direct surroundings. All over the ocean there is an ongoing differentiation which leads to the development of transparent forms within the ocean. These forms, which are focused points of consciousness, move independently from their environment. They experience themselves as different from the ocean (spirit). What occurs here is the birth of a rudimentary sense of self or self-consciousness.

Why did focused points of consciousness arise in some parts of the ocean rather than in others? This is very hard to explain. Can you feel, however, that there is something very natural about this proceeding? When you throw seeds on a bed of earth, you notice that the little plants that sprout will each grow in their own time and rhythm. One will not grow as large or as easily as the others. Some will not grow at all. There is differentiation across the field. Why? The energy of the ocean (the ocean spirit) intuitively seeks the best expression possible for all its multiple streams or layers of consciousness.

During the formation of individual points of consciousness within the ocean, there is a power that works on the ocean from the outside, or so it seems. This is the power of divine inspiration, which can be conceived as the male aspect of That which created you. Whereas the ocean represents the female, receptive side, the male aspect may be visualized as light beams pouring into the ocean, which enhance the process of differentiation and the separation into individual lumps of consciousness. They are like the rays of the sun that warm the seedbed.

The ocean and the light beams together form an entity or being that may be referred to as an archangel. It is an archetypical energy with both a male and a female aspect and it is an angelic energy that manifests or expresses itself to you. We will come back to the notion of an archangel in more detail in the last chapter of Part I, called “Your Light Self.”

After the soul is born as an individual unit of consciousness, it slowly leaves the oceanic state of oneness that had been its home for a long time. The soul increasingly becomes aware of being separate and on its own.

With this awareness, a sense of loss or lack arises in the soul for the first time. When the soul embarks upon its road of exploration as an individual entity, the soul will carry with it a certain longing for wholeness, a desire to belong to something bigger than itself. Deep within itself, the soul will keep the memory of a state of consciousness in which everything is one, in which there is no “me” and “other.” This is what it considers “home” to be: a state of ecstatic oneness, a place of complete safety and fluidity.

With this memory in the back of its mind, the soul starts its travels throughout reality, throughout countless fields of experience and inner exploration. The newborn soul is driven by curiosity and has a great need for experience. This was the element that was absent in the oceanic state of oneness. The soul now is able to freely explore anything it wishes to explore. It is free to search for wholeness in all sorts of ways.

Within the universe, there are countless planes of reality to explore. The earth is simply one of them and one that came into being relatively late, speaking on a cosmic scale. Planes of reality or dimensions always originate from inner needs or desires. Like all creations, they are the manifestation of inner visions and ponderings. Earth was created from an inner desire to bring together elements from different realities that clashed with each other. Earth was intended to be a melting pot for a great array of influences. We will explain this further below. For now suffice it to say that the earth was a relative late-comer on the cosmic stage and that many souls lived many lives of exploration and development on other planes of reality (planets, dimensions, star systems, etc.), long before the earth was even born.

Lightworkers are souls who lived many, many lives on these other planes before they ever incarnated on earth. This is what distinguishes them from “earth souls” as we will call them for the sake of convenience. Earth souls are souls who incarnated in physical bodies on earth relatively early in their development as individualized units of consciousness. One might say that they started their cycle of earth lives when their souls were in their infant stage. At that time, the lightworker souls were “grown-ups.” They had been through many experiences already and the type of relationship they bore with earth souls may be likened to that of parent and child.

The development of life and consciousness on earth

On earth, the evolution of life forms was closely intertwined with the inner development of the earth souls. Although no soul is bound to a particular planet, the earth souls could well be said to be the natives of your planet. This is because their growth and expansion roughly coincides with the proliferation of life forms on earth.

When individual units of consciousness are born, they are somewhat similar to single physical cells as regards structure and possibility. Just like individual cells have a relatively simple structure, the inner movements of a newborn consciousness are transparent. Not much differentiation has set in yet. There is a world of possibilities at their feet, both physical and spiritual. The development from a newborn unit of consciousness to a type of consciousness that is self-reflective and able to observe and react to its environment may roughly be compared to the development of a single-celled organism to a complex living organism interacting with its environment in multiple ways.

We are here comparing the development of soul consciousness with the biological development of life and we do so not just by way of metaphor. In fact the biological development of life as it took place on earth should be seen against the background of a spiritual need for exploration and experience on the part of the earth souls. This need or desire for exploration called into being the rich variety of life forms on earth. As we said, creation is always the result of an inner movement of consciousness. Although the evolution theory, as presently embraced by your science, correctly describes the development of life forms on your planet to some extent, it completely misses the inner drive, the “hidden” motive behind this deeply creative process. The proliferation of life forms on earth was due to inner movements on the soul level. As always, spirit precedes and creates matter.

At first, earth souls incarnated in physical forms which best fitted their still rudimentary sense of self: single-celled organisms. After a period of gaining experience and integrating this within their consciousness, the need arose for more complex means of physical expression. That is how more complex life forms were propelled into being. Consciousness created physical forms to answer the inner needs and desires of the earth souls whose collective consciousness primarily inhabited the earth.

The formation of new species and the incarnation of earth souls into individual members of those species represent a great experiment of life and consciousness. Although evolution is consciousness-driven, not driven by accident or incident, it does not follow a predetermined line of development. This is because consciousness itself is free and unpredictable.

The earth souls experimented with all kinds of animal life forms. They inhabited several types of physical bodies in the animal kingdom but they did not all experience the same line of development. The soul’s path of development is much more fanciful and adventurous than you assume. There are no laws above or outside of you. You are the law for you. So for instance, if you desire to experience life from the standpoint of a monkey, you may at some point in time find yourself living in a monkey’s body, from birth onward or as a temporary visitor. The soul, especially the young soul, craves experience and expression. This urge to explore accounts for the diversity of life forms that flourished on earth.

Within this great experiment of life, the rise of the human life form marked the beginning of an important stage within the development of soul consciousness on earth. Before explaining this in greater detail, we will first discuss the stages of inner soul development in general.

Consciousness evolving: infant stage, maturity, old age

If we look at the development of soul consciousness after it is born as an individual unit, it roughly goes through three inner stages. These stages are there independent of the particular plane of reality (planet, dimension, star system) that consciousness chooses to inhabit or experience.

1) The stage of innocence (paradise)

2) The stage of ego (“sin”)

3) The stage of “second innocence” (enlightenment)

One may compare these stages metaphorically with infancy, maturity and old age.

After souls are born as individual units of consciousness, they leave the oceanic state of oneness which they remember as blissful and totally safe. They then go on to explore reality in a whole new way. They slowly grow more aware of themselves and the way in which they are unique in comparison with their fellow travelers. They are very receptive and sensitive at this stage, like a young child who looks at the world with wide open eyes, expressing curiosity and innocence.

This stage may be called paradisiacal, since the experience of oneness and safety is still fresh in the memory of the newborn souls. They are still close to home; they do not yet question their right to be who they are.

As their journey continues, the memory of home fades while they immerse themselves in different types of experiences. Everything is new in the beginning and everything is uncritically absorbed at the infant stage. A new stage sets in when the young soul starts to experience itself as the focal point of its world. It then truly starts to realize that there is such a thing as “me” and “other.” It starts to experiment with how it can influence its environments by acting upon this realization. The very notion of doing something that stems from your own consciousness is new. Before there was a more or less passive taking in of what flows by. Now there is a growing sense within the soul of its power to exert influence on what it experiences.

This is the start of the ego stage.

The ego originally represents the ability to use your will to affect the outer world. Please note that the original function of the ego is simply that which enables the soul to experience itself fully as a separate entity. This is a natural and positive development within the evolution of the soul. The ego is not “bad” in and of itself. It does however tend to be expansive or aggressive. When the newborn soul discovers its ability to influence its environment, it falls in love with the ego. Deep down, there still is a painful memory within the now maturing soul; it remembers home, it remembers paradise lost. The ego seems to hold an answer to this pain, this homesickness. It seems to enable the soul to actively get a grip on reality. It intoxicates the still young soul with the illusion of power.

If there ever was a fall from grace or a fall from paradise, it was this: the young soul consciousness becoming entranced by the possibilities of the ego, by the promise of power. However the very purpose of consciousness being born as individual souls is to explore, to experience everything there is: paradise as well as hell, innocence as well as “sin.” So the fall from paradise was not a “wrong turn.” There is no guilt attached to it, unless you believe it to be. No one blames you, apart from you.

When the young soul becomes mature, there is a shift to a “me centered” way of observing and experiencing things. The illusion of power enhances separation between souls instead of connectedness. Because of this, loneliness and a sense of alienation set in within the soul. Although it is not really aware of it, the soul becomes a fighter, a warrior for power. Power seems to be the only thing that puts the mind at ease – for a while.

We distinguished a third stage in the development of soul consciousness above: the stage of enlightenment, “second innocence” or old age. We will have a lot to say about this stage and in particular about the transition from the second to the third stage later on in this series. Now we will return to our tale of the earth souls and we will clarify how the awakening of the ego stage fit in with the appearance of human beings on earth.

The earth souls entering the ego stage; the appearance of human beings on earth

The stage in which the earth souls explored plant and animal life coincided with the stage of innocence or paradise on the inner level. Life flourished on earth under the guidance and protection of spiritual beings from the angelic and devic realms. (Devas work on the etheric level, i.e. closer to the physical world than angels do.) The etheric bodies of plants and animals were uncritically receptive to the caring and nurturing mother energies of the angelic and devic realm. They had no inclination to “break free” or go off and find their own way of doing things. There still was a great sense of oneness and harmony among all living things.

The rise of the man-ape, however, marked a transformation point in the development of consciousness. Essentially, by walking upright and through the development of the brain, the consciousness that resided in the human ape got a better grip on its environment. Consciousness as incarnated in the anthropoid started to experience what it was like to have more control over its direct surroundings. It started to discover its own power, its own ability to influence its environment. It started to explore free will.

This development was not coincidental. It was a response to an inner need felt by the earth souls, a need to explore individuality on deeper levels than before. The growing self-awareness of the earth souls set the stage for the appearance in biological terms of man, the human being we know.

When the earth souls were ready to enter the ego stage, the creation of man enabled these souls to experience a life form with free will. It also endowed the incarnated consciousness with a greater awareness of “me” as opposed to “other.” With this, the stage was set for possible conflicts between “my interest” and “your interest,” “my desire” and “your desire.” The individual was breaking away from the self-evident oneness, the natural order of “giving and taking,” to find out what other roads were available. This marked the “end of paradise” on earth, but we ask you to conceive of this not as a tragic event but as a natural process, like the seasons in your year. It was a natural turn of events that would ultimately enable you in this day and age to balance divinity and individuality within your being.

When earth soul consciousness entered the ego stage and started out to explore “being human,” the devic and angelic influences slowly receded into the background. It is in the very nature of these forces to respect the free will of all energies they encounter. They will never exert their influence uninvited. So ego consciousness got free reign and the earth souls got acquainted with all the privileges and drawbacks of power. This also affected the plant and animal kingdom. One might say that the emerging warrior energy was partly absorbed by these non-human realms which created a sense of turmoil within them. This is still present today.

When the earth souls craved new venues of experience, this made them receptive to new outer influences as well. Here we want to draw attention especially to types of extraterrestrial galactic influences which greatly affected the maturing but still young earth souls. It is at this point of our history also that the souls which we have called lightworker souls entered the stage.

Galactic influences on man and earth

By galactic or extraterrestrial influences, we mean influences from collective energies associated with certain star systems, stars or planets. In the universe, there are many levels or dimensions of existence. One planet or star may exist in various dimensions, ranging from the material to the more ethereal dimensions. In general, the galactic communities that influenced the earth souls existed in a less “dense” or material reality than you exist in on earth.

The galactic realms were inhabited by mature souls who were born long before the earth souls and who were in the prime of their ego stage. When the earth came to be inhabited by all kinds of life forms and ultimately by human beings, the extraterrestrial realms watched this development with great interest. The diversity and abundance of life forms drew their attention. They felt something special was going on here.

Between the different galactic communities, a lot of fighting and battling had been going on for a long time. This was a natural phenomenon, in a sense, since the consciousness of the souls involved needed battle to find out all about me-centeredness and power. They were exploring the workings of the ego and as they “progressed,” they became very adept at manipulating consciousness. They became experts in subordinating other souls or communities of souls to their rule by means of subtle and less subtle psychic tools.

The interest that the galactic communities took in earth was mainly egocentric. They felt an opportunity there for exerting their influence in new and powerful ways. You might say that at that point, the intergalactic battles had reached deadlock. When you fight one another over and over again you reach a type of balance after a while, a division of power zones, so to speak. You know each other so well that you know where there is room to act and where there is not. The situation reached an impasse in this way and the galactic enemies hoped for new opportunities on earth. They thought earth might provide the stage for renewing the battle and overcoming the impasse.

The way in which the galactic communities sought to exert their influence on earth was by manipulating the consciousness of earth souls. The earth souls were particularly receptive to their influence when they entered the ego stage. Before they did so, they were immune to any power motivated outside force, because they had no inclination to exert power themselves. You are immune to aggression and power when there is nothing inside you that these energies can attach to. So the galactic energies could not access earth soul consciousness before these souls decided to explore the energy of power themselves.

The transition to the ego stage made the earth souls vulnerable because, apart from their intention to explore ego-consciousness, they were still largely innocent and naive. So it was not difficult for the galactic powers to impose their energies upon the consciousness of earth souls. The way they operated is by means of consciousness manipulation or mind control. Their technologies were very sophisticated. They had psychic tools mostly, not unlike brainwashing through subconscious hypnotic suggestions. They operated on psychic and astral levels but they influenced human beings up to the material/physical level of the body. They influenced the development of the human brain, narrowing down the range of experiences available to human beings. They essentially stimulated fear-related patterns of thought and emotion. Fear was already present in the earth soul’s consciousness as a result of the pain and homesickness any young soul carries inside. The galactic powers took this existing fear as their starting point to greatly enlarge the energies of fear and subservience in the earth souls’ minds and emotions. This enabled them to control human consciousness.

The galactic warriors subsequently tried to battle their previous galactic enemies through the human being. The struggle of power over humanity was a struggle between old galactic enemies that used human beings as their straw men.

The earth soul’s tender sense of individuality and autonomy was cut in its prime by this violent intervention, this war for the heart of humanity. However the galactic interveners could not truly take their freedom away. However massive the extraterrestrial influence was, the divine essence within each individual soul-consciousness remained indestructible. The soul cannot be destroyed, although its free and divine nature may be veiled for a long time. This relates to the fact that power is not, in the end, real. Power always achieves its ends through the illusions of fear and ignorance. It can only hide and veil things; it cannot truly create or destroy anything.

Moreover this very attack on the earth souls did not only bring darkness to earth. It would unintentionally initiate a profound change in the consciousness of the galactic warriors, a turn toward the next stage of consciousness: enlightenment or “second innocence.”

Galactic roots of lightworker souls

How does the notion of lightworker souls tie in with this history? Before they came to earth to incarnate in human bodies, lightworker souls inhabited several star systems for a long time. In terms of the three-staged development of consciousness, they spent a large part of their maturity there. It is in this stage that they explored the ego-consciousness and all the power issues related to it. It was the stage in which they explored darkness and in which they greatly misused their power.

In this galactic stage, lightworkers were co-creators of the human being as it developed. Just like other galactic forces, they had the intention of using man as a straw puppet to win dominance in other parts of the universe. It is hard to explain the techniques that the galactic powers used in their battles because they do not match anything in your world, at least not to the extent to which they perfected it. Essentially, galactic war technology was based on a non-materialist science of energy. They knew the power of the psyche and they knew that consciousness creates physical reality. Their metaphysics were more adequate than the materialist views your current scientists embrace. Because your established science conceives of consciousness as a result of material processes instead of the other way around, it cannot fathom the creative and causal powers of the mind.

At the age of the Cro-Magnon, the lightworker souls interfered with the natural development of man at a genetic level. You should conceive of this genetic interference as a top-down process of manipulation; they imprinted the human brain/consciousness with particular thought forms that affected the physical, cellular layer of the organism. The effect of these mental imprints was that a robotic, mechanical element was installed in the human brain which took away part of the natural strength and self awareness of the human being. There was an artificial implant that made man more suitable as an instrument for the extraterrestrials’ strategic goals.

By interfering in this way with the development of life on earth, the lightworker souls violated the natural course of things. They did not respect the integrity of the earth souls who inhabited the evolving human species. In a way they robbed them of their newly gained free will.

There is a sense in which no one can rob any soul’s free will, as we indicated at the end of the last paragraph. However in practical terms, because of the extraterrestrial superiority at all levels, the earth souls lost their sense of self-determination to an important extent. The lightworkers looked upon the human beings as tools, as things essentially, which helped them realize their goal. At that stage they were not ready to respect life as valuable in itself. They did not recognize in “the other” (their enemies or their slaves) a living soul like themselves.

Now there is no sense in placing any judgment on this, since it is all part of a grand and profound development in consciousness. At the deepest level there is no guilt, only free choice. There are no victims, no offenders; ultimately there is only experience.

You, the lightworker souls who once employed these dark means of oppression, judged yourself very severely for your deeds afterwards. Even now you carry a deep sense of guilt inside, which you are partly aware of as the feeling that you are not good enough in whatever you do. This feeling originates from a misunderstanding.

It is important to understand that “lightworker” is not something you simply are or aren’t. It is something you become, when you go through the journey of experience: experiencing light and dark. Being light and dark. If we had to name you, we would call you the Christed souls instead of lightworkers.

Have you ever had the experience that a bad mistake you made eventually changed things in positive and unexpected ways? Something similar happened as a result of the galactic interference with earth and humanity. In the process of imprinting the earth souls with their energies, the galactic forces actually created a big melting pot of influences on earth. You might say that the battling elements within the different galactic souls were implanted within humanity as a race, thereby forcing the human being to find a way of uniting them or bringing them to peaceful coexistence. Although this severely complicated the journey of the earth souls, it would ultimately create the best chance for a positive breakthrough, a way out of the stalemate situation the galactic conflicts had reached.

Remember, all things are interconnected. There is a level at which the earth souls and the galactic souls were and are driven by the same intent. This is the angelic level. Every soul is in an angel in the deepest core. (See chapter  Time, multidimensionality and your light self, p.103). At the angelic level, both the galactic warriors and the earth souls consented to take part in the cosmic drama sketched above.

The galactic interference not only “helped” earth become the melting pot it was intended to be, it also marked the beginning of a new type of consciousness within the galactic warriors. In unforeseen ways it marked the end of the ego stage, the end of maturity for them, and the beginning of something new.

The end of the ego stage for lightworkers

The intergalactic wars had reached deadlock before earth came into play. When the battle was renewed on earth, it was actually transposed to earth. With this transposition, something started to change within galactic consciousness. The time of the galactic wars was over.

Although they remained actively involved with humanity and earth, the galactic souls slowly retreated into the role of observer. In this role, they started to become aware of a particular kind of tiredness within their being. They sensed emptiness within. Although the fighting and battling went on, it did not fascinate them as much as it once did. They started to ask philosophical questions such as: what is the meaning of my life; why am I fighting all the time; does power really make me happy? By raising these questions, their war weariness grew stronger.

The galactic warriors were gradually reaching the end of their ego stage. They had unknowingly transferred the energy of ego and power struggle to earth, a place that was energetically open to this energy. The human souls were at that time just starting to explore the ego stage of consciousness.

Within the consciousness of the galactic warriors, a certain space was created: a space for doubt, a space for reflection. They entered a transformation phase, which we will describe by distinguishing the following steps:


Being unsatisfied by what ego based consciousness has to offer you, longing for “something else:” the beginning of the end.


Becoming aware of your ties to ego based consciousness, recognizing and releasing the emotions and thoughts that go with it: the middle of the end.


Letting the old ego based energies inside you die, throwing off the cocoon, becoming your new self: the end of the end.


The awakening of a heart based consciousness within you, motivated by love and freedom; helping others making the transition.

These four steps mark the transition from ego based to heart based consciousness. Please remember that both the earth and humanity and the galactic realms go through this phase, only not simultaneously.

Planet earth is now taking step 3. Many of you lightworkers are also taking step 3, in tune with the earth’s inner process. Some of you are still struggling with step 2, and there are some who have arrived at step 4, tasting the delights of heartfelt joy and inspiration.

Large parts of humanity, however, do not desire to release ego based consciousness at all. They have not entered step 1 of the transition phase yet. This is not something to judge or criticize or grieve over. Try to view it as a natural process such as the growth of a plant. You do not judge a flower for being a bud instead of being in full bloom. Try to see it in this light. Making moral judgments about the destructive effects of ego based consciousness in your world is based on lack of insight into spiritual dynamics. Moreover it weakens your own strength, since the anger and frustration you sometimes feel by watching the news or reading your newspapers cannot be transformed into something constructive. It merely depletes you and lowers your own level of vibration. Try to see things from a distance, from an attitude of trust. Try to intuitively sense the undercurrents in collective consciousness, the things you hardly read or hear about in the media.

It makes no sense to try and change souls who are still caught up in the reality of ego based consciousness. They do not want your “help,” since they are not yet open to the heart based energies hat you – lightworkers – wish to share with them. Even though to you they seem to need help, as long as they don’t want it, they don’t need it. It’s as simple as that.

Lightworkers are quite fond of giving and helping but they often lose their power of discernment in this area. This leads to a waste of energy and may result in self-doubt and disappointment on the lightworker’s part. Please use your power of discernment here, as the desire to help can tragically become a pitfall to lightworkers which prevents them from really completing step 3 of the transition. (The notion of “helping” is discussed further in chapter….. and in the channeling “Pitfalls on the way to becoming a healer,” part II).

We will now finish our description of the lightworkers at the end of their ego stage. As we said, at that time you, among other galactic empires, interfered with humanity when the modern human being took form. When you started more and more to play the role of observer, you got tired of fighting.

The power you had been after for such a long time resulted in a type of dominance which annihilated the unique and individual qualities of that which you dominated. So nothing new could enter your reality. You killed everything that was “other.” This way of proceeding made your reality static and predictable after a while. When you became aware of the emptiness within the struggle for power, your consciousness opened up to new possibilities. A longing arose for “something else.”

You had completed step 1 of the transition to a heart based consciousness. The energies of the ego, which had had free reign for eons, settled down and allowed a space for “something else.” In your hearts a new energy awakened, like a tender flower. A subtle and quiet voice began to speak to you of “home,” a place you had once known but had lost track of along your way. You sensed a homesickness within you.

Just like the earth souls, you had once experienced the oceanic state of oneness from which every soul is born. You gradually evolved from this ocean as individual units of consciousness. As these “little souls,” you had a great zest for exploration, while at the same time carrying the painful memory inside of a paradise you had had to leave behind.

Once you entered the ego stage of consciousness later on, this pain was still inside you. What you essentially tried to do was to fill this empty spot in your heart with power. You sought to fulfill yourselves by playing the game of fighting and conquering.

Power is the energy that most opposes oneness. By exerting power, you isolate yourself from “the other.” By struggling for power, you distance yourself even more from home: the consciousness of unity. The fact that power leads you away from home instead of bringing you closer to it was hidden from you for a long time, since power is strongly interwoven with illusion. Power can easily hide its true face to a naive and inexperienced soul. Power creates the illusion of abundance, fulfillment, recognition and even love. The ego stage is an unrestricted exploration of the area of power: of winning, losing, struggling, dominating, manipulating, of being the offender and being the victim.

On the inner level, the soul gets torn apart during this stage. The ego stage entails an attack on the soul’s integrity. By integrity we mean the natural unity and wholeness of the soul. With the entrance of ego based consciousness, the soul gets into a state of schizophrenia. It loses its innocence. On the one hand, the soul battles and conquers; on the other hand, it realizes that it is wrong to damage or destroy other living beings. It is not so much wrong according to some objective law or judge. But the soul subconsciously realizes that it is doing something that opposes its own divine nature. It is in the nature of its own divine essence to create and give life. When the soul operates from a desire for personal power, deep within a sense of guilt arises. Again there is no external verdict on the soul which proclaims it to be guilty. The soul itself realizes it is losing its innocence and purity. While the soul pursues power on the outside, a growing sense of unworthiness is eating at it from the inside.

The stage of ego based consciousness is a natural stage in the journey of the soul. Actually it involves the full exploration of one aspect of the soul’s being: the will. Your will constitutes the bridge between the inner and the outer world. The will is that part of you that focuses your soul’s energy into the material world. The will may be inspired by the desire for power or by the desire for oneness. This depends on the state of your inner awareness. When a soul reaches the end of the ego stage, the will becomes more and more an extension of the heart. The ego or the personal will is not destroyed but it is flowing in accordance with the heart’s wisdom and inspiration. At this point the ego joyfully accepts the heart as its spiritual guide. The natural wholeness of the soul is restored.

When you, the lightworker souls, arrived in step 2 of the transition from ego to heart based consciousness, you felt the sincere desire to make right what you had done wrong on earth. You realized that you had ill treated the living human beings on earth and that you had hindered the free expression and development of the earth souls. You realized that you had violated life itself by trying to manipulate and control it according to your needs. You wanted to release human beings from the bonds of fear and limitation which had brought much darkness into their lives, and you felt you could accomplish most in this respect by incarnating into human bodies yourself. So you incarnated into human bodies, whose genetic make-up was partly created by yourself, in order to transform your creations from the inside. The souls who went to earth with this mission intended to spread Light into their own manipulated creations.

Hence they are called lightworkers. You made the decision to do this – and to become entangled in a whole series of earth lives – from a newborn sense of responsibility and also from the heartfelt urge to take this karmic burden upon you, so that you would be able to fully let go of the past.

Lightworkers incarnating on earth

When you incarnated on earth, you had just started the transition from an ego based to a heart based consciousness. We have sketched this transition as consisting of four steps. You took the first step when you became aware of your longing for “something else,” something different from the struggle for power that filled your lives before.

That struggle provided your lives with purpose and meaning for a substantial period of time. Your fascination with power led you to use the human being as a straw puppet in your galactic battles. All galactic empires were part of this. But when the warring energies were transposed to earth with man as their playground, you became more of an observer and you withdrew from direct battles. You watched what took place on earth. You saw the human being develop into something, a state of being you had reached long before. You had become sophisticated warriors with refined methods of psychic manipulation and warfare. Man was to become the same, with your genetic implants in place.

These genetic implants caused a high level of mental development within the human being. The functions of natural instinct and feeling were more or less suppressed in favor of the function of thinking and reasoning.

We mentioned that the galactic influences caused a high level of fear within the developing human. In fact this element of fear was closely connected with the overemphasis on thinking. In a balanced situation, fear is overcome or put into perspective by your natural intuitive skills and your ability to feel what is right or appropriate to do. However when the faculty of thinking gets the upper hand, fear tends to be reinforced, since thinking relies on a mechanical logical process that does not allow intuition or feeling to enter the process. When the mental faculty is fed by the emotions of fear, it tends to run wild and produce delusional ideas, ideas about controlling everything and everyone. Dictatorial regimes are an example of this mental faculty running wild.

The answer to fear is never to think more. It is to think less and to trust the flow of life. It is to fall back into the state of grace that is your birthright. It is to release instead of to grab hold.

When the stage of ego rule ended within the lightworker souls, they opened up to a new way of being. You intuitively reached out for the energy of the heart. You were in fact looking for a kind of creativity that transcended the mere play with power. You sensed that the struggle for power was destructive and could not create anything new, since it killed and assimilated everything that was “other.”

By trying to control and dominate life, whether inside you or outside you, you actually tried to make reality static and predictable. Ultimately, power is incredibly boring.

When you became aware of this, you realized that your true desire was not to have power but to be truly creative. To be truly creative is to be in touch with your own divinity.

Since you are divine beings, whatever you do or don’t do, you are always creating some kind of reality. Creativity is your very nature. In the ego phase, you explored the possibility of denying your true nature. Indeed this is a creative act at some level, in a twisted kind of way. To be truly creative however is to create according to life, not according to death.

When this realization dawned upon you, the memory of “home” awoke. The vague remembrance of a state of pure and blissful oneness entered your consciousness again and you knew that this was somehow the key to your happiness. But you felt helpless and ignorant, as you had no idea how to go about it. You knew that the ego did not hold the answer but you had not really entered the realm of heart based consciousness yet.

At the same time, a growing sense of remorse and guilt rose within you about what you had done to human beings on earth.

Especially on earth, there were splendid opportunities for consciousness to freely express itself in many different ways. Earth was meant to be a unifier of different energies, a melting pot in which differing and even opposing energies could reach a way of coexisting in harmony. The energetic playground of earth was created to house a very heterogeneous set of energies.

The difference between living on earth and living in other places in the universe, whether on physical or on astral levels, is the enormous variety of energies present on earth. Moreover this variety is not just present as a vast array of life forms or species. It is actually present within one single being, the human being. The human being is able to contain a spectrum of energies that has a wider range than any other being is capable of. You have within you the energy of the murderer and the saint, the energy of the child, the grown-up and the old, the energy of male and female, the energy of active and passive, the energy of the rational and the emotional, the energy of water, air, fire and earth, etc. This may seem trivial or simply natural to you as a human being, but to any other being in the universe it is quite a feat. It is quite a feat to be human at all, without having done anything special.

But the most unique quality of the human being is the ability to meld energies which seemed incompatible before. Man was designed to not just hold all these different energies, but to be a mediator, a builder of bridges between them.

The reason why Spirit or God or All-That-Is came up with the concept of the human being is that the universe had wound up in a situation of stasis. Consciousness, as it explored life outside of oneness, tended to try out different life forms, on different planes and places in the universe. When a soul had experienced all there was to a particular life form, it left – in the sense of not incarnating in there anymore – and went on to other life forms which answered its particular needs. There was no need to transform energy while living in a particular life form. When you wanted a change, you switched bodies. This was not because souls were lazy or shallow. Most bodies, ranging in density from physical to astral, offered limited ranges of experience and therefore limited opportunities to grow or transform while in the body. The body could not hold so many different energies. For example, if you lived on a water planet where you incarnated as a water being, this enabled you to experience the nature of water in all kinds of ways. The “feel” of being liquid, not fixed, flowing, moving, is indeed wonderful. But when you wanted the experience of being fixed and unmovable, you needed to leave that body and live inside of a mountain for a while. Also when you lived as galactic beings in search of power, you could not really change your consciousness within that body.

The consequence of this limited or specialized range of experience within a certain body was that the created world of life forms got stuck. It could not grow or expand and it got sort of locked into a sort of stasis.

The unique power of the human being is the power to hold a wide array of energies and to bring them into a state of creative, not static, balance. Actually this power is equal to the ability to transform darkness into light, i.e. the power of spiritual alchemy. That which brings the formerly opposing energies into a state of dynamic harmony is the Christed energy, the energy that maintains oneness in the face of duality. This is the same energy that transforms darkness, by accepting it and thereby allowing the fear to transform into joy. The Christed energy is the “third energy” which unites by accepting. Its alchemic force lies in its quality of being all-embracing, all-accepting and fearless.

You as human beings are the only being that has this ability for spiritual alchemy. Neither the plants, nor the animals, nor the angels, nor the “dark lords” have this power.

All souls can experience what it is like to be light, what it is like to be dark, what it is like to be all the different kinds of beings that live in the universe, but they cannot experience what it is like to transform darkness into light while remaining in your present life form. They cannot imagine what it is like to change on inner levels in such a way that you create a different physical and spiritual reality for yourself as you go along.

Souls which are incarnate in other than human life forms also “create their reality” and have free will, but they have less possibility to span highly different and even opposing states of consciousness while remaining in the same body, in the same (human) form. You, as humans, are bridge builders, or spiritual alchemists, and that is what makes earth and the human being unique.

We now return to our tale of the lightworker souls who felt anguished and regretful about their interference with the human being. They realized that on earth a whole new game was being set up, a game full of promise, which they had done their best to smother for their own sake. They felt pain because of this. At some level, they also realized they had blocked their own spiritual journey towards light and true joy by their acts of selfishness.

Also when you awoke from your ego slumber, you saw that earth was such a beautiful place, a green planet teeming with life. This stirred deep memories within you. You were present at the very beginning of life on earth. Earth had not lost its innocence then. In those distant times before your fall into warrior consciousness, you were part of paradise on earth, as the angelic beings that nurtured and looked after life. You were angels in the Garden of Eden. Even if later on you acted out your dark side as galactic warriors, you also had with regard to earth acted out a light and pure aspect of yourselves in ancient times, when you prepared the planet for the coming of the earth souls. You contributed to the blossoming of the green planet and at some level, you knew this when you came out of your “warrior” stage of consciousness. You knew you had been destroying that which you had nurtured and helped to create.

When you realized the promise and the beauty of earth, you felt the inner urge to go down there and restore what had been damaged. You incarnated into human bodies with the intention of bringing light and creating heart based values in an environment that was essentially dominated by egotistical values. We want to expand a little on this motive of bringing light, because there is something to it that frequently causes confusion and misunderstanding within you.

When you lightworkers incarnated on earth, you actually started an inner transformation process in which you would complete your own transition from ego based to heart based consciousness. You were on the road to fully release ego based consciousness, and life on earth provided you with the opportunity to deal with what was left of the ego based energy within you. The energies you wished to come clean with you would meet in the very being you had manipulated and would now dwell in: within the human being, within yourselves.

Your deepest motive for coming to earth was to come to terms with your own inner darkness, and you agreed to meet this darkness within yourself as human beings. Although you often think you are here to help others or to help mother earth, the most fundamental reason you are here is to heal yourself. This is your true lightwork. All else is secondary.

At the deepest level your souls wished to take responsibility for the darkness they had spread. However to take responsibility for your dark side is a solitary venture in principle. It does not involve others you need to help or cure. It involves only you. You will help others in the process, but this is a secondary effect. It is important to realize the right order of things here, you know, since you have a tendency to be too diligent in helping others. This enthusiasm to help others often becomes a pitfall, since your energy gets entangled with the other person and more often than not, you feel depleted and disappointed afterwards. Please remember: to give more than to receive is not noble or heart based, it is simply a mistake. The mistake is that you think that you are in part responsible for someone else’s situation or state of mind. This is not true. Everyone is responsible for their own happiness or misfortune. And this is indeed a blessing, as it provides everyone with the power to create and therefore to change their own reality.

You are not here to “fix” other people or mother earth. You are here to heal the deep wounds within your own being. Please tend to this task and all else will fall into place without any effort on your part.

When you came to earth and incarnated into human bodies, you were inclined to fight the energies you wished to overcome. At that stage, you were in a paradoxical situation. On the one hand, you knew you wanted “something other” than power and you hated yourselves for what you had done wrong before. But you were not free of that which you hated in yourselves. You were not free of ego dominance yet. When you came to earth, you had the tendency to get upset by darkness, to get angry about it, and your reaction was to fight it. The paradox is that you wanted to battle egotistical energies through struggle, the very energy that you wished to let go of.

You were as yet not aware of the true implications of a heart based consciousness. When you observe from the heart, there is no battle between Good and Bad. The reality of the heart transcends both. The heart does not oppose darkness. Heart based consciousness is founded upon acceptance of everything, of all that is. It is a type of consciousness that releases the idea that struggle will solve anything.

Although you longed for a peaceful, non-struggling way of dealing with reality, you had no experience with actually living out this ideal. You were really in an “in between-zone,” a piece of no man’s land before you enter a new realm of consciousness.

So you started to make all kinds of “mistakes” in the sense of falling back into ways of being that you wanted to let go of. You were anxious to change or convert anyone or any group who displayed ego like behavior or embraced ego based values. They however responded aggressively to you, oftentimes not even understanding what you were trying to convey to them. Lightworkers have been persecuted for centuries as witches, heathens or political agitators. They seemed to be driven by ideals for which the world was not ready. They seemed different and would not fit in. They typically met with a lot of resistance.

What happened here is that you switched into the role of victim after having played the role of offender for quite some time in the galactic realms. Your “spiritual anger” evoked angry responses from your environment and you became the victim, experiencing humiliation, deep pain and disempowerment. The trauma of being rejected and/or cast out repeatedly in several lives has left scars on your soul. You ended up feeling disempowered and unwelcome. Many of you in this lifetime feel tired and homesick for a more loving and meaningful world.

It is very important for you to realize that the victim role is just that: a role you play. It is one possible interpretation of the facts, but it is a narrow and distorted one. You are neither victim nor offender. You are the soul consciousness that has created roles for yourself to play for a while.

You are not really the victim of a materially minded, selfish world.

In fact, the encounters you had with aggressive, non-cooperative energies in many of your lifetimes simply mirrored back to you your own ties to ego based consciousness, your own dependence upon it. If you seek results through struggle, you will receive the energy of struggle back to you. This is/was your own energy coming back to you! And that is the only meaning of karma.

The tendency to fight “evil” is based upon the belief that evil is outside of you and must be banished from reality. The spiritual invitation to you lightworkers during all of your incarnations has always been to recognize and accept your own dark side and to understand its role and purpose.

The deepest invitation is to forgive yourselves and find back your innocence. You are innocent and have always been so. Can you truly understand that? If you do, you will not want to change the world or fight injustice any more. You will want to play, to have fun and enjoy every moment of your life and simply be who you are and share that with others.

When you lightworkers release the idea that you have to struggle for anything or anyone, you will no longer be opposed by “the outer world,” by society or other people in general, for being different. You will not want to change anything and therefore you will not encounter resistance. You will know that you are welcome, that your contribution to this reality is valuable and that you are valued by others.

When you have fully released ego based consciousness, you will know you are exempt from persecution or outside threats. You will have gone beyond the roles of victim and persecutor; your journey will have come full circle. You will have released your karmic burdens and you will be totally free to create whatever you want.

You are on the verge of birthing a new consciousness. This is a type of consciousness that has fully released the need to control or possess anything. It is free of fear. It is the Christ consciousness.

When I, Jeshua, lived on earth, I wanted to tell you that spirituality is not about a war between light and dark. It is about finding a level of awareness that goes beyond good and bad, a place from which you can understand and accept all things. “The kingdom of God is within.” Everything you need is on the inside. Peace, joy and tranquillity are yours when you truly realize who you are: a divine being in physical expression.

It is only when you realize that you are here to transform and heal yourself that things really start to change for you, and as a side effect, for other people surrounding you. The world is what it is and the highest thing you can do for it is simply to love it for what it is. Love and see the beauty of every single being that is traveling through this plane of reality.

Many of you are moved by my energy, the energy of Jeshua or Jesus. This is because I am your kin. I was simply a lightworker unburdened by karmic ties, a lightworker in possession of a high level of self-understanding. You are touched by my energy because you know this is the energy you are moving toward. The energy of Christ is the energy of your own future self.


Tzaddi 3rd November 2008 10:10 am

Aha! This piece ties together some fragments of my understanding like a gentle web embracing all. Thanks.

Joanie Tara 3rd November 2008 1:23 pm

Every now and then I read a peice of work that feels so true and so comprehensive in that it sums up many of my thoughts and puts them down in print so eloquently, this artilce does just that and hence I am glad to share it with all my freinds, thank you, Joanie

Liliane 5th November 2008 8:58 pm

What an amazing message. It makes so much sense to me. I feel lighter already.Thank you Jeshua & Pamela.

graham koster 9th November 2008 11:24 am

I absolutely agree with Joanie in her comment and would simply like to add that this is my first sampling of Pamela's work and I am truly impressed with its clarity and and her (Yeshua's) ability to explain the unexplainable in a way that I find totally understandable!

Thank you and I look forward to tuning in regularly from now on.


kamilla 11th November 2008 10:05 am

What a profound message! Some Truth is slowly being revealed, some more of the Veil lifted. Is it for the preparation of the Whole Truth for the Last Judgement Day when WE the Humanity as a WHOLE will be The Supreme Judge? and HOW one even enlighten Being can be happy, satisfied, joyful when his neighbour is suffering, hungry, exploited, and his suffering is well known and witness by so many? This suffering damages not only neighbour himself but The SOLE of the WHOLE so how one can be distant from it? New Era requires new thinking, feelings, knowledge, and after all the work we did we are entitled to it. One can forget and forgive the harm done to self but not to the neighbour or loved ones...


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Jeshua Channelings

Jeshua Channelings

On this website, we present spiritual messages about inner growth, the christ energy, lightworkers, the new earth, and the transition from ego based to heart based consciousness. These messages have been received from an inner connection with Jeshua. “Jeshua ben Joseph” is the original Aramaic name for Jesus, the personification of the christ energy on earth. In these channelings, he presents himself as Jeshua, a brother and friend to us rather than the deified authority that tradition made out of him. His energy is still available to us, not so much as a fixed set of ideas or rules but as a pointer, showing us the way to the Christ within.

Books from Pamela Kribbe

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