Paul attended one of my free classes in Idaho and stayed after the others left to ask a personal question. Paul had been planning a vacation at a golf resort in Washington State for some time when a new acquaintance invited himself to attend and share a room for the weekend. Paul is a very polite and considerate man, always conscious of the feelings of others, sometimes to such a degree that he allows himself to be taken advantage of.
His weekend was only two days away and Paul was finally embracing the truth of the situation. He wanted no part of this other man. Paul said Glen was unkind, selfish and loud. Glen was not aware of boundaries and consistently stepped into Paul’s comfort zone. Glen was also quite needy, controlling and clingy around Paul, and Paul wanted to use this weekend for introspection and quiet personal time. He was in a quandary. How does one get his needs met without hurting others or retracting commitments? We sat down together for about 15 minutes to talk and work. I introduced the following tool and moved Paul through it step by step. We parted ways and I never expected to hear from Paul again.
The next morning, as I was scanning my e-mails, I noticed one from Paul. When he returned home from the lecture the night before, he retrieved a phone message from Glen. Something more important had come up in Glen’s life and he couldn’t attend the golf weekend after all! Interesting how energy works.
There are two great tools I teach to help separate your own energy from others. Tool # 1 below can be used in situations where you want to remove a particular someone from your mind and field of attention. It also works when you have moved on to the next item of business and found yourself still thinking about the previous one. Now you can make separations from others whom you find yourself thinking about long after you have left their presence. Many massage therapists and psychotherapists find this a helpful tool to complete the session with one client before they begin to work on another. Doing so keeps the therapist from accumulating and holding all her clients in her awareness. By the end of the day she won’t feel like an opossum with all her babies on her back, or a kangaroo carrying her offspring in her pouch. Keeping a person in your conscious awareness or even in your subconscious awareness does not benefit either of you.
Making Separations - Tool # 1
1. Take a few private moments to clear away some of the noise from your internal environment.
2. Be in the Center of Your Head. Anchor here and get comfortable in your imaginary director’s chair.
3. In the area 12 inches in front of your face, imagine or remember a white Rose.
4. Think of someone who is irritating you or just consistently on your mind.
5. Visualize putting him in this Rose and watch what color the Rose turns. That is the color of his energy in your space. This is not “bad” energy. It just doesn’t belong to you. He wants it back in order to feel whole again. So do you.
6. Give the command to this Rose to collect up all of his energy and this color from your space.
7. One way you can do this is, imagine the Rose below your feet. Ask it to slowly rotate around your body, collecting up all of this energy that isn’t yours.
8. When the Rose reaches a point above your head, thank the person, think of one thing you appreciate about them (a tiny appreciation is okay here) and move the Rose away.
9. Explode the Rose or make it disappear. All their attention and energy will automatically return to them. Another option is to simply tell the Rose in front of you to collect their energy and color without moving from that location. When it is finished, you will know. Then you may thank the person, think of one thing you appreciate about them and explode the Rose or make it disappear.
10. Take a moment and completely replenish yourself with your Golden Ball of Light. Be sure to fill those areas in the physical body that may have tingled or twitched or otherwise released this person.
It is important for the success of this tool that you remain as neutral and uncharged as possible. Sometimes when you are releasing other people or beliefs from your space, uncomfortable memories or feelings may surface. Sometimes the physical body experiences sensations. This is a normal indication that the tools are working. It’s just energy and the more you can stay in the Center of Your Head, Ground and Run your Energy, the quicker those uncomfortable logs will be dislodged and swept away in the river.
Have you ever done or said something and then realized you sounded just like your mother or father? The “Making Separations” tool not only helps you release folks that might irritate you; it helps you empower those you love. Allowing a loved one his full independence and power is an invaluable gift. As you make separations from people in your life, you are returning their energy and attention back to where it belongs – with them. When someone has left his attention outside of his Six Points, it is as though he has scattered his one-dollar bills all over town. When it’s time to buy food and pay the rent, there is nothing left. As your loved one leaves his energy and attention on you, he is operating on less than 100% and that doesn’t feel good to him. So – the most loving thing you can do for your friend, child, lover, pet or the sales person on the phone is give him back his energy. In the process, you are also clearing your own body, mind, emotions and attention of what doesn’t belong to you. You’ll both feel more whole and empowered if you make separations.
The other people in your life are not the only ones who scatter their energy and attention. So do you. Just like them, you don’t intend to leave your attention and energy with someone else. You just may not be aware of what you’re doing, you may want to help them or you may need something from them. And when you have left any amount of your attention somewhere other than within your Six Points, that power isn’t with you. You’ve left your dollar bills all over town and now it’s time to take your sweetie on a date. No dough - nothing left in your wallet when you need it. Next month I will share another tool with you that will enable you to give others back the energy they left with you while at the same time calling your own energy back home to you where it belongs.