Leaders of a New Humanity: The Emergence

“We are so delighted to be a part of something so magnificent, that which you call ascension, and what we call “homecoming”.  We say home-coming because each of you who is leading the planet to her destiny carries the activated vibration of home, of Source energy within…and though many of you have had to dim your light to fit into a world that was once unfit for such magnificence, you are now emerging in the fullness of pure-heart radiance. Pray tell.”  -Seven Sisters of Pleiades

So much has shifted since the last update! As soon as I started to reorient myself to this new mental space, the unseens started hammering me with boatloads of information…and as long as this article will probably be, it is only 1/3 of what they have to share with all of us…compliments of the integration of the eclipse sandwich that took place back in June/July. Which sort of feels like forever ago…and yet a day.

The many multidimensional shifts that have taken place since that eclipse portal are starting to avail themselves both within the human (collective) mind and in the resulting external structures in our world.  These internal changes being felt by more of us now are breeding contempt in the collective psyche, rendering an emptiness in so many who previously felt fulfilled within the 3d dimensional paradigm structure. (think family & friends) These uncomfortable feelings now surfacing within the many sectors of human society are successfully starting to threaten all remaining global systems that continue to uphold separation over unity.

The Flowering

Just in time for the 6th day (the flowering phase of The Tree of Life), in the 11th heaven of the 9th (& final) wave of the Mayan Calendar… which ends on 10/28/11 according to Carl Calleman… and as a result of the rising discontent in those around us, the time has come for the way-showers to honor and share our deeply held & hard-earned wisdoms with more of humanity.  For those leaders of the new world who have been held back, unheard, thwarted from complete self-expression or deterred from sharing full-truth with others, your time has come. The unseens say that this group of souls has received the clarion call to come out of hiding, to stand up in personal truth with honor & integrity, to bear witness to the changes that are taking place all around us, and while holding the vastness of our wisdom and knowledge with authority, with sovereignty, but most importantly…without fail. This will mean different things to different people, but I am hearing that each of us will be tested in some way to apply the full strength of our light.

“Now, we realize that this may be a bit of a struggle for those around you…in the sense that the changes in you will require changes in all those close to you, and to that we say…be not afraid.  Be all you came here to be lest you risk losing an opportunity at magnificence. The time for shining your full light is now and you will be presented with many situations in the coming days which will require this of you. We are not saying that this will present challenges by way of discordance, but by way of displaying your inner-strength in a manner that can be definitively seen, felt and heard by others.  Many of the new leaders have been hiding behind the cloak of unworthiness for far too long, waiting for the final reconnection to your genetic excellence…for these souls, a great opening is upon you, a shift in the way you participate with your truth and display it to others.” -Seven Sisters

For those who have begun this transition into full-truth, into authentic being-ness, and are arriving on the “other-side”…a congratulations is in order!  Your world is already beginning to shift in magnificent, supportive & awe-inspiring ways. And this is just the very beginning.

The true measure of our authentic self-expression is realized by the level and amount of reciprocation from the world around us now.  Our external world is always an accurate depiction of our inner-dwelling, so as we participate with the physical world from our singular point of truth, the reflections of our light now shining back at us can be eye-opening and heart-expanding…revealing/reflecting not only the accuracy and alignment with our authentic core-selves, but the physical evidence of our unmistakable inner-beauty that has been…for so long…quashed under the weight of our self-perceived limitations.

In other words, we are being de-cloaked and as a result the outside world is beginning to see our divinity…our pure-heart radiance… because, ultimately, we are now more aligned with and operating from divine LOVE.  These experiences of being “seen”, for who we really are…and as if for the first time…can be jolting after so many years of hiding our true selves and being discounted or judged by conventional thinkers steeped in doctrine.

Coming out can be off-putting because, lets face it, we’re gun-shy…and even when we do need to use our guns, they are always cocked with a string of defenses…some from rote memory, some completely made up: like when you run into an old friend from yoga whom you haven’t seen in 5 years and after a very thorough once over, you get asked the fateful & dreaded question….“so what have YOU been up to?”  And in that very moment…you’re presented with the sobering reality that it  a b s o l u t e l y  looks like you’ve done nothing…except age…and your faced with the depressing double bind decision of…Do I lie to her, or to myself?

This is that moment when all the blood from your limbs pools in your ears, noise fades, and someone from deep within you emerges with an interesting and “creative” story about just.what.you’ve.been.up.to.

We’ve all been there and wondered who we can & can’t tell that we’ve actually spent the bulk of the last 5-7 years in fetal position waiting to be (re)born.

But that’s over now.  According to the unseens…no more hiding.  We are being called forth by those who need us and we will be received with love.  Not only that, but once we move past the insecurity of being judged or laughed at, the unexpected warm reception by others can spur a knee-buckling level of gratitude.

You may be noticing these true heart-based connections emerging all around you…even with strangers…a feeling that suddenly everyone’s light has been turned on.  But the truth is that these are just the reflections of our own internal light shining so brightly now that the world can finally see it.

This is how you really know when its your time to shine.  Not only because you have something to share, but because you are being beckoned to share it.

Navigating Split-Realities

“The realization that some of you are leading this brigade, and even more are following, is an important distinction to make at this juncture.” -Seven Sisters

In the last update the unseens mentioned a changing of the guard ….”as the collective world consciousness inevitably cascades into greater levels of fear… and their overall sense of security is rocked, there will also be those of you who will be simultaneously rising to meet great success”…and they have more to share about that today.

What they want to make clear is the fact that only those who are complete in their spiritual maturation process are in the preparation period to lead.  They are saying that….“Those who will be stepping out as the beacons of light in a time of darkness will experience a vastly different reality than those just beginning to look within”, and they would like to offer some assistance with regard to handling the split in reality structures that we are beginning to witness.

This split is becoming REALLY noticeable, and it can feel alienating to not be able to relate to so many who are still living out the old-paradigm.  For that reason it is becoming increasingly more important to understand how we operate within this new perceptual field of awareness because it is tremendously different from the old.

For those stepping into leadership roles, I am hearing that there is coming a more deeply-felt sense of liberation than those around you will experience, in addition to a more visceral understanding of timelessness due to the level of expansion that this group of souls has achieved.  Juxtaposed against this reality will be those who are just beginning to awaken to their divinity, and for this group there is coming a profound shift in consciousness that will, or already has begun to rapidly deteriorate the 3d dimensional reality structure that they have been participating in.

For these peeps, and most likely it’s no one reading this, it may seem like the rug is being pulled out from under them as their whole world shifts on its axis.  Those at the front of the parade are well-versed in this matrix dismantling process and so the leaders/wayshowers will be stepping into position simultaneously as the 3d bubble begins to burst for these awakening souls.  In other words, some of you will be to the next wave what our invisible spirit guides were to us…in some cases, and depending on your role in the plan, you will be the “physical” guides who will be escorting these folk over the bridges to 5D that we have been constructing for years.

For those of you who are leading, you are coming to really know who you are and what your role is in the bigger picture now…it is becoming feeling-based…meaning, what you have “known” was true now “feels” true.  For years, this group in particular has been awakening to the greater part of themselves, the part that is here to lead humanity to its destination…but without a context to apply that information.  The sisters share with me that the context is now formed, and the result of this will be much greater clarity and a keen understanding of what we are physically here to do at this stage.

“In a sense this information is not new to you, but it may feel new…and we realize that there are those of you reading this who have little understanding or clarity around what your role is in the greater plan, and to this we say: everyone is in the process of awakening to much greater personal truth…all at different and varying levels of consciousness…and all in the perfection of the divine plan.” -Seven Sisters

Lastly, I am hearing that for the teachers of new-humanity (teaching is a very broad term), the matter of how we receive information and share it with others is changing in a big way.  The Pleiadians say that it is important to understand that there is no longer a gap between what we are here to experience and what we are here to teach.  The example that they give is if we are here to teach others about healing, there is no longer a gap between our personal state of health and the information that we teach about healing…in other words, we are stepping into embodied presence and so our own healing IS the teaching.

This means that instead of teaching from a future perspective of what “will be”, we will be teaching from presence of “I Am” or “what is”.  We are becoming integrated teachers by experience (heart) over teachers by knowledge (head) …the difference is in integration versus concept.

Time is folding in on itself and so we are finally becoming that which we are here to teach. This is pretty exciting because it means that we will finally have credibility are anchoring into real-time awareness and are beginning to discover the many joys of operating from the realm of oneness.

Physical Happenings

“No longer is the physical body merely a space for your soul to sit in, but it is enlivened with christed-intelligence and has a “mind” of its own, so to speak.”  -Seven Sisters

And finally, the sisters want for us to understand that our bodies are undergoing major, major changes…most of which we can feel, but not mentally grasp yet.  We are adapting and conforming to the new system (light) intelligence that now sustains us and yes, there are many symptoms associated with these changes…especially appetite/digestion oddities as we alter the Source of our physical nourishment… but I am hearing that we are soon to notice things that we haven’t before.

One of the things that they mention in addition to deeper psychic development, is that as we become self-contained in our energy field, we will begin to feel that our body is operating on its own accord, seemingly independent from the world around us. This is exhilarating in the sense that we will begin to feel the freedom from lower dimensional dross as we are released from the discordant planetary matrix that presently houses us….however, without awareness, the unseens feel that changes could cause confusion or stress and so they want to palliate any potential fears.

This disconnection from 3D is already noticeable in small ways, like the inability to feel the discomfort that others are going thru or even feelings of alienation since nearly EVERYone around is experiencing some form of chaos and it can feel odd and lonely to be blissful and excited about the falling world.

“Keep in mind that with the acceptance of your divinity comes the realization that those things that are still deeply-human, that is to say…still operating form a place of separation or limitation…will seem very far away and foreign to you.  You will feel a disconnect from much of the life that still surrounds you, however, this detachment is necessary and required to move into your new dwelling space.  What we recommend is that you focus less on the disconnect you feel between your new awareness and the awareness of others, and more on the connection that you feel between your head and heart.  This is where the magic is happening and all else will eventually fall away to reveal the essence of the full truth.”  -Seven Sisters

For me personally, this has meant a great deal of exercise for my compassion muscle.  Connecting to those who are hurting thru love, and not suffering, requires discipline…I find it to be a delicate balance between validation, holding a safe space, and reflecting higher truths…all at once.  It’s a lot like juggling.  And what I have found really odd is that we have worked so long and hard to move beyond the (e)goo, that you would think it would be easy to access all those years of struggling so that relating would be effortless…but we are so presently focused now that this doesn’t seem to be the case at all.  It literally takes effort now to relate to things we have been fighting thru for years and years and years.  It’s that higher-dimensional amnesia, I tell ya… pretty peculiar stuff.

Mostly, the sisters want to make clear that any disassociation we are feeling is normal, healthy and that we will find it very helpful in assisting others. It’s not that we are exiting the matrix of human life, just the matrix of human suffering.  The difference is mostly in perception, and we are simply rising to meet a new outlook.  Consequently, this “release” will ground a feeling-based understanding that we are not our body, but that we are participating within a body, within a life, and within a divine-human context.  Again, not new information, just a deeper integration of it.

“There will be so much more to share on this in the coming days, but for now all that is required is the understanding that you beginning to identify with your divinity…not your egoic perception of divinity, but the actual presence of it. You are getting glimpses of what it means to be spirit in human form…the phase of embodiment that we refer to as “the realization of your divine body” and it merely requires the understanding that you are changing from one form to another.  We assure you that this is not the aggrandized version that would see, perhaps in movies, but more of a subtle shift of expression from limitation to limitlessness.”  -Seven Sisters

We have had to literally disidentify with every aspect of being a so-called human in what the sisters have termed the “release of the pain-body phase”… which is why it took so freaking long…but the divinity phase they say, is much more natural to us and will feel more seamless in its unfoldment.

Are you ready to shine?



zorro 21st September 2011 6:53 am

A great, and such a welcome post, Lauren.

Your posts are like Rosetta Stones that decipher the many changes we are going through as we become a new living language, and the new human.

A new imprint is now taking hold and finding expression.

bluehydrangea 21st September 2011 7:30 am

Disconnected from others around us.......that's exactly me right now. In my family, both the males are currently sick, with physical and nervous problems. I just HAVE to disconnect from it all, otherwise my health will collapse as well. I am doing what I can to help them but I do feel most of the time that I am living a different life. Apart from tiredness and running around like a mad thing, I am in generally good order.
I am a blue-ray, supposedly a highly-sensitive being, here to observe and heal but I feel more like a doormat right now.....and there are times when I wish I was no longer here.

Deeni 21st September 2011 8:37 am

The Universe heard me, again.

Yep, I asked . . . no, more like begged, to hear from Lauren, to set me straight. To help me to acknowledge what is now transpiring in my life.

I thought I was going mad, you know when you watch the news but you don't f e e l the news. I use to avoid the news, because of what I let it do to me, but now . . . nothing but thrills. Our old paradigm is falling apart, and I am Divinely happy about it.

I actually tune in 2 - 3 times a day, like laying in wait for everything to come crashing down, and then I will celebrate. For it has been my experience that it must crash, before it can be built anew.

After I am done celebrating, I will help create the world I would like us all to be living in. And I'm chomping at the bit to do just that!

Thanks Lauren, and the Seven Sisters,
Lots o' LOVE and LIGHT to you
Nadine : ))

Tulim 21st September 2011 8:44 am

Yes, very good. Words on what I feel.


Essence 21st September 2011 9:58 am

Hi Lauren,

Thank you once again for a really informative, integral and so well timed message ...

I can really relate to your comments about Releasing the pain-body Phase and am DELIGHTED to know
that I am now in the process of completing this Phase of my Healing and entering what you
so beautifully call the Divinity Phase ...

as you know the pain-body release phase is not easy, but it is Very very do-able with the endless help of our
Divine-Inner-Friends who are definitely with all of us that read this web-site and others like it ...

Here are some of my comments, practical tips and some advice, to help anyone in the Pain-body
release phase ...

I sincerely hope they are of help to others ...

Blessings and Love to You
and All,



... Continued on the next message ...

Essence 21st September 2011 10:02 am

Clearing the Poo ,,,

I can happily say that whilst I am still going through hardship, particularly financially, that I am On The Other Side
of this Negative Energy Soul-Saving Clearing Process, it is Totally orchestrated by my Divine-Inner-Friends who are guiding and
protecting me ALL the way in very clear, compassionate, loving, often humourous and effective ways.

I have put a huge amount of effort into clearing the negative, invasive and certainly unwanted, Chakra-overlay programs from
my energy system, it would not have been possible, without the beautiful Divine help I have received. They use totally advanced
healing techniques and technology that has been regularly used on my own-inner-healing-system to strengthen and clear it (it was previously blocked
by anti-Spiritual negative alien technology which was put into my own Chakra system).

For me it seems impossible, in my experience to do this by ourselves ... we are in the middle of a very beautiful and Powerful Soul-Saving Mission by a Remarkable massive group of Divine Beings.

Blessings to All

from E


Essence 21st September 2011 10:05 am

I would like to help a little more, based on my extensive personal experience of dealing with the often strong Electrical Pulses which are Very Invasive attacks on our Most Sensitive and Private parts of our bodies, especially during sleeping time or as reaction to our being very happy about something ....

I put three small 1.5 volt ‘walkman‘ size batteries in a plastic bag, for convenience. I make 5 identical bags and put one bag on each Chakra (base Chakra upwards to the Throat Chakra) Sometimes for 5 minutes or so, sometimes much longer (falling asleep with them on, with them lying close to you, can work wonders!)

They have a Remarkable Effect upon the Negative Overlay system that was imposed upon our Chakras .... I also have a little pack in my work bag for when I use a computer as the computer triggers the Pulse Attacks too and the INSTANT RELIEF is just great! Putting them near my Crown Chakra and/or the Back of my Neck/Nape whilst I lie down is also really good to stop the mindless CHATTER (which will stop in time for all of us).

Blessings and Love to All

from E

Tulim 21st September 2011 11:19 am

Tripy stuff, Essence! I feel drawn to try that but I'll give it some thought. Sleeping with batteries on my body seems a bit weird at the moment. As for me, as I said, Lauren's message resonated. But I don't feel at peace. Things are falling all around me, financially, affectively, and organisation wise. I have no worry about finance. I can live with nothing. I had some struggle with the affective side of the shift. I now feel totally unable to relate to the 3D world. People aren't authentic and they really act crazy now. I feel that Soul is here, but then personality also sometimes. I learn to act from soul, which is a serious change of paradigm. But things are not stable yet and I have to admit that it's a serious roller coaster here in my ego!LOL.
Lots of hugs,


kdawn 21st September 2011 12:58 pm

This is the first message of Lauren's that did not feel like where I am. I'm like the ones bluehydrangea describes, with physical & CNS problems. I actually have about every single symptom of kundalini awakening, without the awakening. No matter how much I pray, desire, intend, try...things only seem to get worse, and it hasn't seemed that I've had any Divine assistance at all, at least not that I am aware of. Although this has not deterred me from digging deep to transmute the negative stuff buried inside.
But I seem to be "stuck" in an incredibly (-) environment with people who are not at all aware. I just found toxic mold in the house I've been renting for years, and I need to get out of here, but I have nowhere to go, and am too ill to even move by myself.
I'm pretty sure I'm Indigo, definitely Highly Sensitive Empath (fun!). I've wished many times that I was no longer here, but I've hung on thru 17 yrs of excruciating pain, because I've felt it was my mission to overcome & then help others. But I can't anyone like this - despite my lifelong spiritual quest & attempts to heal.

amberhill 21st September 2011 12:59 pm

Absolutely spot-on. The message is as felt so deeply here.

Thank you, Lauren, and let your leadership be blessed.

Much love.

k 21st September 2011 1:35 pm

kdawn, I am sorry, I know what you are talking about. To heal, I walked away from about everything, leaving it in my ex-husband's hands and traveling in an RV in search of a place of peace. My guides brought me to a mountain forest where I have been in solitude with trips to town only for suppies for over a year.I went south for two months to stay at an Rv park,in the winter and went through hell there.I realized for sure then how much the energies around me can cause me to suffer.There are dark energies in cities and in certain places and I think to heal, a sensitive person needs to spend time in nature away from the maddening crowds.To do that though we have to face the fear of letting go of many material possessions that we think we need.Letting go is hard, sometimes we have to let go of big chunks. Finally, when you think you are empty,an attachment pops up and the world crashes for a while,but with each time,we get stronger and letting go gets easier.Until we come to a point when we know this is a dream, and the wonderful real world that has been hidden from our senses can be.

k 21st September 2011 1:56 pm

My little world, where I am one with nature, the elk bugle, the turkeys calling, the black butterflies, the hummingbirds at my feeder, the many beautiful birds that come to my window, the rainbows, the awesome sunsets, the smell of pine in the cool breeze, these things were all created just for me because I am loved.
There is no world to save or to serve, this is a world for training delinquent gods. LOL. The creator of all, is all good, but we are put into the kingdom of the Demiurge where dark forces have their way with us until we learn our lessons. Then we are allowed to go HOME. This dimension is not home, we are just passing through it. We can communicate with home when we meditate, when we can connect with the real world that we are not able to sense until we become empty. Then we can feel it and know that it really is there. What we see as the world is not real, and there is no need to try to fix it.

k 21st September 2011 3:10 pm

Many would not agree with me, but I am going to put this out on the line. The idea of manifesting a better world, planning on being a teacher of those coming behind us, or a leader in a new better world, keeps souls attention attached to the illusion. It is like in the Allegory of the Cave, by Pluto, it keeps us focused on what we think is the real world, the shadows on the cave wall, so that we will not take our eyes away from the shadows and seek the exit. It is like telling us that the shadows can be made better if we just focus hard enough. If the shadows do not get better, it is because we do not try hard enough. This world is full of dark entities and energies. It has been allowed to be this way, it is the kingdom of the Demiurge, but it is all illusion. Even science is telling us this as in the Holographic Universe written over 20 years ago. Science keeps confirming this. We are not here to save the shadows on the cave wall, we are here to find the light that we are, that will lead us out of the cave.

k 21st September 2011 3:41 pm

Jesus, in the Book of Thomas, and the Buddha both told us that the world is perfect, but most can not see the perfect world. They were able to exit the cave of illusions and shadows. We can not get out of the cave if we hang on to the shadows, if we stay attached to what we think is real. We might be able to manipulate the shadows and make them better, but we will still be in the cave of illusion. The path out of the cave is hard and hazardous and only attempted by those who know there is something much better outside of the cave that is worth the sacrifices and suffering.

kay 21st September 2011 4:20 pm

Lauren, you continue to astound me with your receptivity to the energies. You and the unseens walk with me and encourage me and make me smile whenever something clicks, which happens with every article. I'm so grateful for that.

k 21st September 2011 4:48 pm

Jesus said....a leopard can not change his spots or an Ethiopian the color of his skin. Those who are not of the Light can not be made to be of the Light.

Starfast 21st September 2011 6:41 pm

Hi Lauren and all Indigos: My heart is full for what you have accomplished and will accomplish. Home is where your heart is, and it is now your choice to "Make Home." Love to you and thank you for inspiring this elderly Indigo Elder.

k 21st September 2011 6:57 pm

It surprises me that so many focus on this small little planet and hold so dearly to our physical forms, stuctures of society, etc. When out of our bodies the whole cosmos opens to us. Not just our universe, but all of creation. When we think of what is available the details of this small world really are insignificant. It is like some people in a small raft hanging onto it as if it is the whole world and they can not see the huge luxury liner right next to them. We can not see the bigger picture because we are so busy focusing on the shadows on the cave wall, trying to make this world the way we want it to be, when really it is so insignificant. We can plan, we can think we will be leaders in this small world, we can try to manipulate the shadows on the cave wall, but unless we expand our vision we will still be in the cave when there is an incredible world outside of the cave.

Sunny 21st September 2011 9:36 pm

This part was hilarious and it made-my-evening because I can totally relate to it:

Lauren wrote: "....the fateful & dreaded question….“so what have YOU been up to?” And in that very moment…".

As usual, her writing is excellent. It is the "best" in my humble opinion.

-With gratitude for Spirit Library for posting her work for us each month; I always look forward to it.


LordJesusChrist 22nd September 2011 1:59 am

As an Eternal Wise Leader of a New Humanity, I command you to live forever and prosper just as I do in My Mighty Name Lord Jesus Christ, the Son of God. Alleluia! Amen! *******
My Good Wisdom
:thumbs: :angel: :smitten:

Kevin 22nd September 2011 4:28 pm

How much light do I feel you have just let into this world! You are truly a visionary of love that I find enlightening and inspiring, to say the least :)
I love every message from the Sisters and I cannot thank you enough for being the avatar of light and love that you envisige with every word!
I am so so so grateful to be able to read your words and feel your presence with each post. I am a fan and chela of SPIRIT which you are my dear one!
Peace Always
Kevin/Three Feathers
Toronto, ON

Toni 23rd September 2011 5:48 pm

:thumbs: Spot on Sister

Sunny 23rd September 2011 5:57 pm

I would like to correct my post (above) to say that I think that Lauren's work is "one of the best"....because there are SO many spectacular inspired/channeled writings on Spirit Library that I love to read! Lots of love, S.

netdragon 24th September 2011 12:07 pm

People will lead themselves. Those who came here to help are just here to lend a helping hand. But if humans choose not to do it for themselves, then nothing will happen.

amberhill 24th September 2011 3:00 pm

I am very confused about this mass that still doesn't want to change. Patience, patience..

When a baby is born, it is pure.

So maybe if the stubborn ones can't deal with all the energies of what's going on, they go for now and emerge again later, pure. I think in that case they stand a better chance to have a better life as the collective consciousness has changed already. They would enter a purer world without the old luggage of beliefs.

I had this vision last winter: Earth will always (am using this word though it's not accurate but lets not get stuck here) be there as a training ground, and people will always (same) be here to learn, to evolve. So we are here to help, but maybe the real Earth inhabitants will never be as some of us are, at least not in the near future of some thousands of years. We're here to prepare the shift, but we can't teach them to be more than they can be at this time.

As my acupuncture doctor used to say: make evolution, not revolution.

susie_walker 25th September 2011 3:10 am

@ k - sending you such huge gratitude for putting your wisdom 'out on the line'. Your words really stopped me in my tracks. Really stopped me in my tracks.

I have truly been focusing on the shadows, trying with all my heart to make them better and of course beating myself up when nothing really changes and assuming that is because I haven't tried hard enough.

Time to focus instead on getting out of that cave ...

Starshine 28th September 2011 7:14 am

Has anyone else experienced a painful solar plexus lately? Mine has been really sore. If anyone knows a good method for soothing this, please post up.

Love & Light

amberhill 28th September 2011 12:26 pm

Cassie: put a carnelian on it. Lie down and breathe into it. Actually having carnelian on you or with you (pockets, bra etc) most of the tine should help.

happyme 2nd October 2011 8:08 am

this message resonates with me. For the last 8 years i felt as if I had something important to do, but I was doing "nothing", and didn't matter how many things I have accomplished, I felt like I wasn't doing "IT"
The Ego fall is very terrifying, and I can understand why not everybody would want to go through that face... but once you've past that comes a period of uncertainty, a re-birth, and now as a newborn you wonder around this new world, sometimes falling back in to old ways (we need reassurance and nourishment since we feel so alone), but just as a kid grows older and learns the language and to communicate his needs, so your new-you.
One particular thing I found is that I can feel my own gentleness and that wonderful warmth can sooth me... and intuitively I'm passing that to my kids, and they are responding to it in a wonderful way. I have noticed small kids around me, that do not know me at all, simply smile and run to me to give me their hands and a beautiful smile.