Beloved, where are you going? What journey are you on? This time around for you isn’t likely your first time around, yet who knows and how significant is a question anyway? There are more meaningful matters than curiosity or stealth to account for.
True gratitude is love. If love is dependent upon a gift or a particular act, then it isn't love. True love is true gratitude. When you are grateful that someone exists, then that is love. We are cutting to the chase.
Beloved, why are you delving into love when love is a given? To receive or to give love are not so different as you may think. Love is not a contest. It is a not a test. You are love on Earth or in Heaven. Love is your expressed DNA.