To begin with, God doesn’t “want us” to experience pain. God doesn’t “want” anything. God experiences GodSelf through us, and knows GodSelf anew in that way. God does not come from “wanting-ness,” but from Total “Havingness.”
For you to be willing is a great thing. Instead of resolute, you are willing. You are willing to accept. You are willing to enjoy life and jam and butter. You are willing to let go of error.